Vivid dream last night reminiscent of Saas-Fee in its colors and interiors of its bars. A revivifying dream in that I hadn't got enough sleep the previous two nights. I felt alone and the place did not conform to the exact memories I have of Saas-Fee, especially the depression I felt because of the oppressiveness of the mountains at night shouldering their way into my bedroom through the pitch blackness, reminding me of the time I lived in a small town in West Africa with its weird night inhabitants. A vivid form appeared in a corner of an interior, a kind of weird sexual being with voluptuous legs but small, it stood in the corner and had the presence of a form in a Francis Bacon painting without the blood, almost like an inverted exclamation point whose presence held my attention while I discerned its fishnet hosiery, or the circular, whorled form of a dog turd. Then a human sexual being appeared, of a dusky color, a Baudelarian whore, of indistinct sexuality, hir breasts barely prominent but pointed, like that barber here in town whose silicon shots made his chest under his turtle-neck shirt appear to have very erect nipples, titillating to me. This sexual dream being held my gaze with hir gaze, not allowing me to look down at hir sex, so I did not know it, yet I could see s/he was naked, hir bronze color suffused evenly throughout hir skin, hir gaze caught by mine and holding it like an animal frozen in headlights. I moved on and encountered some boys or young men, reminiscent of those I met as classmates in Saas-Fee. They were playful with each other as the latter were, and even poked each other in the ribs in jest, much like that gay I knew in Albuquerque who roomed with me in a house, and invited his "side-kick" (he did not want to initially tell me he was gay for fear I wouldn't allow him to share the house with him) over once, Craig, the man, playing with the hair of Dominick, the woman, as the latter knitted, one time I observed Craig at a party poking Dominick in play, then later going outside in the backyard and kissing him, he said that they were never deep kisses for fear of contracting AIDS. Then I left this interior down a staircase that had a strange strap-like gate every few steps that I had to latch shut behind me, the latches very vivid and sharp but whose mechanical nature I cannot describe let alone remember. Outside I was in the same steep terrain as Saas-Fee's, yards that served as grazing for dark, hairy cows and at 45 degree angles, but I felt more closed in and confined to funicular paths that I had to be careful to negotiate and I could not look ahead consequently. I was headed to a place, a row of dim stalls, perhaps exuding the air of skiraums or lodges, or those strange, dark larder houses on stout, mushroom-shaped stilts that I was told prevented rats access to the store of cheeses inside and other victuals for the winter months in the mountains. Then I recognized D, one of my classmates, but I did not talk to her, but entered a place I can't remember since it was dark as my bedroom in Bettina house where I stayed with another classmate, R, in Saas-Fee. I felt exposed and alone, having been left behind, sometimes I returned at night to my flat in Bettina house very depressed and lonesome for my wife and children, from whom I have no dearth of attention normally (that has an effing lit'rary sound, 'dearth'). Then I came out of the darkness and felt naked, as if I had not found in the darkness what I was looking for, my clothes, perhaps? Packing my backpack that night before R and I left Saas-Fee to return to our normal lives, from where we had come. Finally I was alone, seeing the sky from the side, like J and I on our walk on the mountainside above Saas-Fee, he and I had fallen behind from the others, but in the dream I was alone, in a strange place whose name formed its own mind in a word in my mind which I cannot recall, somewhere in the U.S maybe.